Thursday, June 4, 2009

working it out

I am picking up more and more hours at the Library I work at. I am loving working in a job that involves books and is near home. It is actually the library that my mom's best friend started many years ago. I use to volunteer there as a child and have many memories of being there with her. She passed away before Emma was born and I miss her everyday. But being there is like being in her presence and following in her footsteps.

Anyway, I am loving learning the ins and outs of how to catalog books and so forth. It is a lot more work then I ever dreamed off. However, Emma is having a hard time with mommy being gone. I am never gone for more then 7 hours but to her it feels like forever. Luckily my parents, his parents or Daniel have her at all times. But she always wants to know "where mommy go?" (one of her first sentences by the way) I hope she learns to adjust to me being gone, but it has been rough so far. Even though her grandparent spoil her while I work:) Lots of McDonald's and Barney:)

To me working the ten or so hours a week is helping my self-esteem so much. It allows me to step away from just being mom and be Rachel for a few hours. I also get to take a step back from all the stress of her medical conditions causes and I get to focus on something else for awhile.

Do not get me wrong I love being a stay-at-home mom and would not trade my time at home with Emma for anything, but it is nice to get awhile for a few hours. I mean I only work for about 10 hours a week at the most right now. PLus, a few of those Emma is with me for storytime:) This is good for me and Emma since she will be in school in the fall three days a week and she needs to be use to leaving me for a few hours, since right now she is always with me which is the way we like it:) Emma and me against the world.

Please pray she adjust soon and stops yelling at my husband to go get mommy:)


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