Monday, March 23, 2009

I have not forgotten

I will post soon about all that is going on, but I really do not have the time currently to do so. I promise things are a little bit better. I am doing my best to focus on the good and ignore the rest as much as I can.

A new day will dawn and it will better I pray!!

Peace, love and library books:)

Monday, March 16, 2009

Bring on the Rain

I love this photo of Emma,it is from her friends Kadence's birthday party. She loved hiding out in the "tent". I can not say I blame her right now, since we are spending more and more time at the doctors.

The other night, while starting to clean out what is suppose to be our office/art room, I heard a song that really fit my current life. It was "Bring on the Rain" by Jo Dee Mesina. The part I really loved was: The battle lost but not the war, so bring on the rain"

WOW !! That is my life to a tee right now. So, much is going with Emma, but we are not really getting any real answers or solutions. We just keep finding out new things about her or something new to try to make it better, but no real explanations as to why or how to fix it all for good. You can read all about what is going on with her on her website , but I do not feel like going into it all here.

So, anyway, I feel that I am fighting a battle that is never going to be won. We make advances and we get kicked back but the war is still going on and the war will never end. We will fight till my girl is well. However, the rain is falling on our family hard and fast. We are not sure where to hide, but we are hiding together (her daddy and me that is) We spent the weekend trying to not drown, but it is really hard. We are not sure where to go or what to do next. We are constantly having to either give her medicine or do her treatment for her belly. We are seeing so many doctors right now it is making us all crazy, Emma included.

So, where do we find shelter from this rainstorm? I am not sure, but someday the rain either has to stop or at least slow done right??


Thursday, March 5, 2009

I might run away:)

Life is such madness right now, I can not possible write about it all. Let's just say we are in doctor craziness. We have either seen or will see almost everyone of her doctors this month. Which has brought up a lot of new and stressful matters.

When I have some answers I will write all about it, till then pray we are able to find out answers to many unanswered questions we have. Also, pray that the stress of so many doctor's visits will not affect Emma to much. She does okay but it is still scary for her.

Daddy and me are really tired from the stress and the no sleep (Emma is having night terrors at night). We are so worried and confused right now with what is best for her health and her education as well (that is a whole other battle we are in). She is a very complicated girl and it seems to always get all crazy at the same time.

This is making all of us worry a lot and really hope that we soon no something to do to help her. I am so worried about her, but I really wish I could just take her away and hide at the beach. Or as her daddy said last night, "I wish I had a magic wand to fix it all right now"

I really wish we could make it all disappear even for a day or two and live in a world not full of doctors and pain. Like I said I might run away! A mom friend of mine said she would gladly help me escape even it was for an hour:) I might have to do it! I really need a moment to relax and refocus. My brain is all jumbled and crazy right now! This mom and me took a mommy break a few weeks ago and it did a world of good for us both. We both have children who have unique traits and we are able to share many of the same frustrations and fears, it is always nice to share with someone who is able to understand what you are saying. Even if it is only an hour, it will still be nice to run away! I swear I will return. I love my family to much to run away for good.

Love and craziness